Monthly Archives: November 2015

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Midnight Of Chronic Pain

Chronic pain and trauma go together like tomato and mozzarella in a caprese salad. May I please just have the salad (making sure to add basil, salt and olive oil) and leave the pain behind?  I pray for the day when it will no longer be necessary to perform “pain management” strategies.

Only for the courageous in spirit, chronic pain is an opportunity to have a dialogue with the inner core of your being.  When the pain elevates, I often choose to open my journal and unleash my pen on its pages.  I wrote the below piece, “Midnight”, during a very dark and painful night, both physically and psychologically.  It turned out that my inner being wished to redefine the darkness/midnight.

Midnight

In the depth of the darkness

When all are in deep slumber

Here I am

Alone in Pain.

Darkness envelops me

Carries me to uninvited regions of existence:

Where am I?

What happened?

How did I get here?

What is the meaning of my existence?

What universal and personal truths am I to glean from this circumstance?

Waiting for the sunrise to poke from the depths of darkness.

Is the sunshine (or at least daybreak) coming?

If so, what do I do with the sun?

Stumbling in the darkness,

I have lost any answers that I ever had the illusion of knowing.

Quietness, darkness, solitary soul.

There is nothing to do except be.

Be in the grounding of faith.

Faith that the sun rises.

Faith that questions turn into answers.

Faith that pain turns into pleasures.

Let go of the struggles.

Clothe yourself in the midnight.

The midnight brings safety and quietness in the midst of turmoil.

Look up and breathe.

Breathe in the denseness of the midnight.

It is a time of germination and growth.

As countless seasons have quietly vanished,

You have struggled to put the pieces of your existence together.

Forcing pieces into jagged crevices–You had to know it wouldn’t work.

Arise and embrace the darkness

For it is your salvation.

Salvation in the bigger scheme, framework of the universe.

Stand tall.

Embrace your authentic voice in the midnight hour.

Darkness cannot conceal the light;

It may seem like it at times.

But the midnight hour is the best hour to christen the real you,

The authentic person that you were born to be.

Arise in the midnight hour and be still in prayer.

Light and answers will come, in Divine Order and Timing.

Namaste.

Redefinition #2:

Just for this moment,

I will reach out my weary hand in the darkness and seize faith.

Faith that the sun rises.

Faith that  questions turn into answers.

Faith that pain turns into pleasures.

For, no matter the circumstance, light is, and will always be, more powerful than darkness.

Light reigns supreme over all. And so it is.

Photo credits: “Faith” photo by Nora Serna. Header by Lisa Sharpe.